Doing what has to be done

I think I realized today

that all I really can do

it what has to be done

that is why I have feel so rushed all the time

because I have been doing

what has to be done

and then some

and some more

I just can't do that

If I just do

what has to be done

I think it will fill my day

That must be the key

to beable to be a mommy to the kids

because what has to be done

gets done

leaving out that extra stuff

that I would like to do

not that it is stuff like

getting a pedicure

a massage

going shopping

or watching tv

I am talking about

blogging

organizing

crafting

and such

I am going to just have to say no for a while

and do the minimal

so it all can get done

so I can be present

every moment past three

when the kids get home

I want to get places 1o minutes early

instead of feeling my heart pound

because I am afraid of being 10 minutes late

I want to do what is most important

all the time

finding that balance

I tell you

Its a daily thing

I can tell you one thing

I enjoyed storytime with Baylen

more today then ever before

He sat in my lap

the whole time

and watched

and watched

We sang the songs when he got home

it was AWESOME

I talked with Bo's teacher today

I continue to be amazed with her passion for him

I am concerned about him

he is one intense boy

the kindest thing

yet very intense

and can snap

just like that

I want him to know that

that I love him so much

and I think he is the neatest

most unique little thing I ever saw

I enjoy watching Samantha

try to be so good

which she is

she is so good

I don't think

I could ever

ever

get mad at her

She is so sweet

so sweet

Baylen

you continue each day

to blow me away

with how smart you are

so smart

And piper

I am still having a hard time

to keep you or not

I am thinking way to much

I am trying to control

I want you to be Riley and Walker

and that is not fair to you

I want you to be you

I need to come to grips with that

I hope I will soon

It was a good day

A good Feb 1st

I did what had to be done

nothing more

that is my goal

and I also want to think

about what is right in front of me

and not over think

or over do

but find that balance

and just live it out

and trust

that it is in His hands