Wednesday Whatevers

So I rest my case with not really having control
I say it often
but it is so true
Yesterdays blog went on and on about how good it is
and believe me
it is
But....
My agenda today was story time
clean a little
play with Baylen
Shop a little
and get a haircut and brow wax
Like for real
Just me
In a chair
getting pampered
Just for a few
And then
Bo comes in our room
at 2 am
and throws up all over me
and then again
and again
for the next eight hours
He managed to hit just about the hardest places to clean
sofa, carpet, comforter, rug.....me
I really was not even planning on showering today
Really
And I will be honest
really honest
I still didn't
yuck
I am honestly just realizing that as I am typing this
wow
So....
the washer ran all day
and I went to buy Gatorade
Did a lot of back rubbing
and pillow fluffing
and it still was a great day
It reminded me of what motherhood really is all about
And how it gets better and better the more you have
I love not knowing what the next minute may be
Well I should not say I love it
but I do love how it constantly reminds me of little me
and how BIG God is....he calls the shots
He makes the plans...even though I try
I love helping with homework
then pulling Bo out of a tree
and then rocking Baylen
and feeling this one
knowing that soon I will see him or her
So it ended up being a wonderful day
We decorated the Christmas tree
I love to watch Baylens face
He was very concerned with us having a tree in the house
I love that
Bo did some dancing
Samantha did some bossing
Piper did some sleeping
It was perfect
I love to sit by a lit christmas tree...I love lights
As I continue to feel anxious about keeping a clean house having gifts bought and wrapped and on and on
I am reminded of what really matters
and how as long as we are all healthy
and together...
that is all that matters
I hear daily of tragedy all around me and it always ropes me back in
Baylen is laying on daddy right now....
and yes it is almost ten...
but he is being so good
He is repeating everything that is on tv
and he is pushing the frosty the snow man button on a Christmas animal
over and over
and it is quite humorous
So here are to days that are days that we did not plan
Even though I am still praying that this baby waits until the day I planned...
really
Just hoping I am not going to be ultimately tested on whether or not I can handle something unplanned
we will see
we will see
and by the way
I do not sleep anymore
and I wonder if I will ever forget the numbness/burning sensation that I feel hip down most of the time
I would not mind forgetting it...
but I hope I never forget the feeling of a heel trying to come out of my belly button!

Dear Lord, please help me trust You and empower me through Your Spirit to stop my emotions from bossing me around. I want to quit worrying about what might happen and focus on what has already happened by remembering and praising You for Your faithfulness in my life. In Jesus'